August 2006

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You have all played the game before, right?  Its like the result of midnight film noir, afternoon westerns, morning things.  We all dream of things that might have been, places we can go play that may look like work, levels of effort far different than the regular ones that include:

work, work, work.  There is nothing else so we end this bubble!

I still have my sets of “wanna be” things.  I’d like to learn how to write Perl but I don’t have a certain mindset for coding.  I’d like to travel back to Asia because I like Japan and Korea.  Will that happen?  Who knows.  Its not on my list though.  Its getting time for me to rev up the blogging engine.  This here blog has been around for over a year now and I’ve managed to back it up, restore it, keep it alive.  That’s darned good for me.  But as Neil says,

once you’re gone, you can’t come back…

Who knows if I will come back to write another day?  Perhaps I do because the blog is the thing that I leave when the words are through.

All is said and done.  Fade to black.

I had believed that I would blog each day this weekend; but yesterday we got away for hours with the family to Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk.  I am not much of a ride person so I had the Santa Cruz Beach Beerwalk.  I watched my 8–year old ride rides, eat massive amounts of all kindsa stuff, get excited, get tired, and finally ask to go home.  When the powerhouse asks, the rest of the family unit knows she is tired and needs a change.

My son on the other hand, likes to just go and ride the so-called more dangerous rides.  My wife teams up with him and my daughter with me and then we swap on occasion. Its fun but its not really my kinda place.  My wife says I should be at museums and aquarium exhibits explaining prehistoric and paleontological factoids.  I don’t know about that one.

As we finished up and after some number of beers of a variety of types, I felt very comfortable and slightly drunk and tired.  We had walked for hours in the sun, watched the kids play on the beach, found a decent place to eat, and then redid the entire walk a second time because there were rides up at the other end that needed to be ridden again.

It was decent fun, the cost was relative, and I was able to apply adequate social lubrication for enjoyment’s sake.

 

I’ve been doing the so-called “startup” thing for awhile now.  I worked at the fabled Linuxcare for years and now I’m at Levanta which used to be Linuxcare but now its something else.  Confused?  Its all in the silicon.  Valley that is…  Things change and remain the same and then they change some more.  I can look at the changes and think, “whoa… I’ve been through this and that…”  But today is Friday so its the start of daily blogging over a weekend again.  I hear from friends now and again on Fridays asking me to Gordon Biersch for a brew or two.  Truth is I don’t really go out that much these days.  Once in awhile Ed and I will go out for a Chevy’s break which consists of some amount of dos equus in large glasses, chips and salsa, and perhaps a plate of food or two.

Now it is Friday and the bloggability stretches out before me.  Look out!  I am on the loose starting here in a bit.  The weather is cool and nice in the bay area.  Its inviting me out and about.

I feel the cosmic yin/yang of things I see and don’t see.  Its getting difficult.  The keyboard is not working and I…

two hours later…

whoa.  sorry about that.

 

As an interesting point of view, my significant other (namely spousal unit) and I were discussing the years we have managed to be together and the things we’ve been through. It seems the first 10 years or so we were busy making the memories and the last 10 or so years we are busy remembering them. First 10 were things like fun, travel, archeology, nomadism, school. Then kids. Exit the travel so much for the first years. Suddenly with a 2 year old travel became rather painful. So we substitute other less distancing things. Walk to another room for example. Sleep less. Go out less. Then whammo! First kid begins to almost be a human being. He can talk, walk, use the potty. The potty! What an advancement. No more years of diapers.

Then school sets in. More crises. I don’t make enough money and I travel too much. I’m gone months at a time in places like Barstow and Bakersfield and the Eldorado National Forest. Enter new career path. Suddenly I don’t travel and I make more money but the company I’m with gets swallowed up and the CEO has a heart attack at home. Blech. Off I go again to a different reality.

More voices of Life calling sweetly to me. Saying in their quiet, screaming way,

Mike. You should listen. Are you f**king deaf? Things and times are changing. You gotta do something. The spousal unit is getting unhappy. For heaven’s sake! You live in the Bay area. More money!!

So I move on. Other voices and dreams and whistling winds…

Is this the way you all see things too? Its like two different lives when one crosses the age boundaries. Suddenly life is meant to be lived vicariously. Well checks take a year to get done. There are just more things that can go wrong. All the crap you want to go down, goes up and the stuff you want to go up stays down. What in Hell?

Then there’s music. Here I am listening to Metallica because I like ‘em. I hear music filtering in from next door. What the hell is that crap? I always wonder when I’m driving somewhere when the music is so loud it vibrates how someone can say they are listening to it? Again, its the vicarious thrills. Music is a way of life to me. It thrills me, saddens me, makes me think. I think for others its the opposite. Its an escape. It takes them away from thrills, thinking, emotions.

Anyways, then we get to the job thing. I’ve got a prognostication to make and I’m damned serious. I doubt I will be doing technology in another 2 years. Because those voices are calling me too. But I live in the Bay area and my spousal unit does not say it directly but the meaning is there about what it costs to live here. I mean… It costs almost 750,000 to buy a house these days. Geez. There is no first and second part of life with that. Its all one part. Its called buying and paying and never owning. When I was a kid, my mom and I lived in a trailer that was ours. It rocked in the wind and the power plug was bad and sometimes the water stopped. But we laughed. Laughing is good folks. There is not much laughter in houses these days. Only quiet desperation. That same desperation that Thoreau told us all about so many years ago.

Its sad, and the voice of life still generate within me. They want more now.

Someone asked me Wednesday of LWCE whether I was disillusioned.  I don’t think that’s the word for it overall.  More like disaffected or perhaps tired is a better word.  I’ve been wondering if I would somehow reach the point where I started considering other things to do or become.  Its my vision that we all have to change, re-arrange, and redo ourselves and often that re-arranging is tumultuous and dangerous and stressful.  The show approaches the same.  I think it wants to change and I think there will be casualties.  One will be the community pavillion and the dot.orgs in general.  If I were IDG, I would question but unfortunately even when IDG questions they don’t know where to find the answers.  Its not board meetings and corporate sponsorship.  I have a different idea for them.  Let the LWCE grow and mature and become some corporate venue for open source.  Attract the sponsors and membership that will attend.  Many of the community types will simply steer away from things then and find their own venue.  Perhaps a show like SCALE which offers that blend and with control.  I like the blend of community and corporate when its done right.  When done right, the two can complement each other and the past SCALE shows I’ve gone to have shown that blend with diverse and exciting exhibitors, presentors, and attendees.  I also have met the show organizers and they grok the need.

So, I see LWCE changing and re-arranging and many of the people that do the show will do it for a different reason or just not.  Its the real truth that many of the people I always look forward to seeing attend things much less these days.  They just don’t have “the time, effort, or energy” to drive a few miles to see the MOTO-HP-Dell-Intel-AMD show.  This is not a slam or insult because there is a reality on the other side too.

I’ve decided I’m done with a few things around the show including the lunches.  The Linuxcare Labs reunion lunches had a great run and we had some great guests; but I’m done.  I may be done with yet other things in the short-term if I don’t see some change there too. I’m done with LWCE because I’ve outgrown it and its changed past what I want to do.  I’m gonna go find another venue for my attendance and SCALE is gonna be it.

Thanks to IDG really for showing me what they think the show should become and what my participation level will be.

Over and out for now.

Unfortunately, I cannot do the last day; but I wanted to catch up on things from the second day.  The overall impression I have is that its a good show but attendance is down or at least traffic to exhibitor booths is.  I have a few reasons for this:

  • The show is changing its venue effective this year.  People want a common show that provides all of the goodness
  • IDG really does not capture mindshare with the show at all and their messaging does not resonate to potential attendees or contributors
  • The organization of the commercial entities and the free ones don’t align.  Huge Motorola booths and the little dot.org.  Somehow we have allowed an imbalance in the force
  • No one doing Linux or developing tools or applications really cares anymore and they want something else.  Perhaps a grassroots show like SCALE?  Or maybe more focused regional shows that showcase various advances in open source

My overall impression of a show at Moscone is that its better than a show in Boston; but I also really liked the New York shows.  Someone asked me at the show, “why even attend if you are not a large enterprise looking for something?”  That’s a troubling question because open source goes beyond all those commercial solutions and really starts and ends up back the dot.orgs.  Unfortunate that IDG cannot see the forest for the trees and cannot seem to build a show venue that will be more things to more people.  Truly unfortunate that people that sell, presell, manage, and delivery solutions only see the Motorola booths and the HP booths and think that is Linux.  To be successful and make a difference doing Linux solutions, one has to at least acknowledge that the community solutions have simply outlasted many of the commercial ones.  And long after Novell dusts off SuSE and retires it, the community distributions will continue.  Why?  Because they are simply better and don’t rely on the kindness of strangers to even have an existance.  When I started with Linu there were umpteen commercial vendors of Linux.  Now there are umpteen thousand community ones instead.  No big marketing deals, no co-branding, no sales imperatives.  Take the Gentoo, the Debian, the others for a spin.  If you want to make a difference in Linux; siupport them in a way that leads more to their doors.  Its where Linux will be after the show hype.

I am not going back to the show today primarily due to family issues; but I think I’ve seen enough for yet another year.  Thanks to Art, Ned, Greg and the group that did the lunch yesterday for Linuxcare Labs.  I don’t know that I will organize another one.  Perhaps the time has run out on that endeavor as well.

Today was the first day of the exhibition part of the trade show and here are my unbiased and overly positive comments.  Debian guys!  Finally a cowsay t-shirt.  Whoa!!  Its about time.  Cowsay must be the unofficial mascot of Debian and its cousin “SL” which is a great joke on the standard way to list files (ls) on a Unix system always is good for a laugh.  Perhaps the funny man pages also come in there somewhere.  Thanks Debian for reminding me that life is indeed moo.  Secondarily, IDG in their infinite corporate wisdom managed to get the dot.orgs in the right place almost.  Now they’re stuck in a corner when they should be in the middle.  If anything leads Linux its the work of these dot.orgs.  A bit of remembering where all this came from is probably called for IDG. 

The show is good and that’s probably because its in San Francisco and there is rampant Linux and open source running around these vallyes and peninsula towns and east and south bays.  Its also good because there is a lot of big influence on open source out here as well. 

There is no Redhat booth and I’m glad.  There is just something about Redhat which distresses me most times.  Its not the quality of their enterprise or community products because I think products that have to have the name enterprise really should be called something else.  Novell included.  You Novell guys with SuSE Linux with YAST and all its meandering GUI-ness should remember the KISS principle.  I don’t particularly and personally care for Linux in those flavors at all; but I understand why others do and I work at supporting and servicing those that do.  After all we cannot all be so enlightened to use Debian .

The show floor was busy today and people came and went in waves.  I ran into lots of people I wanted to run into and none that I did not.  That’s a good mix.  I tried to get our sales guy to go to the dot.orgs but he seemed clearly uncomfortable about that trip.  Perhaps he sees no benefit in that walk.  Don’t know.  But all of this Linux gooey goodness springs from somewhere.  Perhaps tomorrow he’ll relent and go visit that mountain with me.

Finally, the show was just plain fun.  I walked the floor, talked with some folks I had not seen in awhile.  Its fun because many of the people I see like Clay I know I will only see once per year at a show and then its really good to see them.  Some folks I would love to see at the show just don’t go anymore.  That’s too bad.  I separate out the shows when I want to see a grassroots community thing I head to SCALE.  When I want to see a corporate, enterprise driven fling its LWCE.  Dig that SCALE has announced their 2007 venue.  I am so almost there and will be there totally in Feb 07.  Thanks to the guys at SCALE for doing it.  Its a show to do if you want good papers, reasonable costs, etc.

Well, even more significant than two blogposts in two days; its also time for the San Francisco chapter of the Penguin at the Moscone Center.  The big OEMs and the dot.orgs are lining up for their respective but unequal places.  I’m hoping that this year IDG gets it right with the dot.org pavilion and actually gives it a place and not a few feet of carpet like last year.  So, I always ask the big questions:

  • what will I do this year at the show?
  • will the show provide new and interesting Linux hardware and software?
  • will there still be free beer?

While all these are definitely important and have their place, I mostly go these days to meet up with old friends from other times and places.  I always think back to other shows in my checkered past like giving away a car, getting a cease/desist order for a poster, having some of the most unusual show giveaways (like bugsuckers), and the people that transformed the shows into events.  Linuxcare back then was fun and it was destructive and we let most of it come out during the shows.  We gave away stuff, we actually did deals at the show.  I remember a deal went down with a certain OEM at the show in one of those small meeting rooms on th exposition floor.

If you’re heading to the show, stop by the dog.orgs and give something in your wallet to them.  They need it because of the work they do.  Most of all, if you need a quality Linux distribution there is no real need to go to a Green Lizard or a Red Hat.  There are distributions made for people.  My forecast of the current crop of the less than admirable consumer distributions is there will be one less by the time next Linuxworld SF rolls around; yet the people distributions will continue and be more popular.  Choose Ubuntu if you want a nice Debian.  I could almost recommend Fedora; but I travel in different directions since I alway seem able to break a rpm distribution with minimal attempts.

I’ll be there at the show Tuesday and Wednesday checking out stuff.  I will also probably write a blogpost each day kinda summing up the great stuff.  Perhaps a gratuitous link or two to old friends and their home places.

See ya there!

You probably all already know that the PC is celebrating a birthday.  I was a sort of late arrival to the PC business; but when I look at what I have now compared to the PC that my employer at Edwards AFB helped me get, its amazing.  Consider the differences in a mere 20–some years.  My XP desktop has 2g of system memory, a 250g Maxtor SATA drive, a 128mb nvidia card.  Whoa!!  Others tell me that’s a minimal system.  For me, I have two of these Pentium 4 Prescott systems that do wildly different things. One is a capable server thta does VPN, Mail, Usenet, Samba, NFS.  All of that for free.  What was my Linux desktop now runs XP Professional for a variety of reasons; not associated with personal need or desire.  It came down to work requirements and I decided that I had to do what I had to do to get more productivity from daily computing.  I just don’t have the time to boot an OS inside an OS.  I consider XP to be a tool user’s choice for what I do.  Its not perfect but then again no OS really has been (since OS/2 Warp, that is). 

Now we have the 25th anniversary of the common PC.  Consider the evolution of it; but mostly consider the evolution of business and philosophy around the PC and all that its done for us in business, school, life.  I believe that inventions are closely tied together and there are single things that come along that “fork” many paths.

Take this weblog even for example or the so-called blogosphere.  Without the PC, how much of this could have been done?  I venture to guess close to none.  Blogging seems to be the way that news permeates from some corners of our weary world.  Weary of violence, fighting, fervor.  Why do we need all that?  Like someone once said, “can’t we just all get along?”

I doubt it.  We need killing fields because we are lowly primates after all.  Higher orders of intelligence understand that we are just lowly humans and that we must engage in our battles for oil, land, money.  Perhaps the first two shadow the last one.  If its not money; its access to the money.

Enough composite realities.  You got my promise if the PC can live on for 25 years that this here blog can also.

 

On to Sunday

I’ve given a bit of thought to the succession of days when I blog regularly and it comes down to Saturdays and Sundays these days.  Weekends are made for beer and also for introspection I think.  With two kids, I always look at them rather vicariously and try to feel the keen joy my daughter finds in every day things that she suddenly groks.  There are the big things to figure out and then there are small wonders to unravel and learn.  She is of the questioning age.  Everything around here is either a question or an answer and it all depends on what she’s done of late.  So I tend to travel the same world but I’ve seen those particular sights before.  I don’t really want to guide her all the way and explain it all; because a lot should be left to her wondering gaze.  I do get the feeling that she knows a hellofa lot more than what I think she knows.  And she knows that I know…  Its both distressing and a relief that we both have kinda figured out the patterns for some things.

Other things remain elusive though even to me.  I watch what I do day in and day out.  Is there a real method to the madness or do I do it for a shorter term financial gain or because I love it?  I’ve blogged before that I think after this startup, I will want to move on to other things.  I can see a pattern outside of Linux and technology and open source and stuff.  I applied once for a job as a park historian.  Imagine the “being outdoors”.  The taking people to see a thing and explaining it.  Archeologists, even armchair ones like me, can explain things really well.  Years of prehistory are grist for their mill.  I could see a time when I don’t so dote on what I run on a computer compared to what I do with what I run.  I am a computer habilis.  Its a tool to me.  I use the tool.  When one tool suits me not, I move on.  I do like Linux in a few flavors but I bound all of that great exuberance with doses of reality.  Now for me its “getting the job done and more”.  One day in the future it will be “even more than what it was”.

Then I’ll know what the more is and how to get there.  These days I am quite happy with what I do and it challenges me in many ways to have what I have.  But tomorrow is a turn of the page away.  And if you live by what that famous singer said, you just gotta “turn the page”.  The actual turning may not be so much.  The transformation, the rebirth, the refinding of value may be more.  I’ve told a few work colleagues I think I am approaching the zenith and they don’t believe it. I hear a few things from them like how could I ever went to move away from this or that.  Its more about moving toward something than away.  As an anthropologist of note once told me “there is nothing so constant as change”.  People, ecologies, institutions all must change.

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